just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
