we have officially lost it.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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