things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
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