if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
