It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize
