i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Randomize
