My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
