Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
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