Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize