sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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