It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize