Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
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