My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Randomize
