Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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