Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
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