Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
