Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
