Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
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