Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
