I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
