I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
