I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
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