Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Randomize