It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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