I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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