Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
