I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I know her cup size but not her name....
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