East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize