turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize