My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
