I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
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