Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Randomize
