Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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