Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Randomize