it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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