im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
