even my farts smell like vagina
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
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