I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
