no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
