You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
