Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize