it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
