the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
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