We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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