it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
