what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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