When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
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