i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Randomize
