And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
