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• (248): View more from Michigan

  What you up to?

  (734): View more from Michigan

  Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Full throttle

  (734): View more from Michigan

  Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.

  Fav 11 1913 836

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• (813): View more from Florida

  I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?

  Fav 37 13980 1464

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• (305): View more from Florida

  Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.

  Fav 47 1181 9897

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified

  Fav 5 1758 869

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.

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• (909): View more from California

  I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..

  Fav 12 2547 1372

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• (423): View more from Tennessee

  What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.

  (1-423): View more from Tennessee

  Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.

  Fav 5 2372 1070

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.

  Fav 3 1125 556

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment

  Fav 3 524 871

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• (636): View more from Missouri

  I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.

  Fav 1 1158 534

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• (562): View more from California

  Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!

  Fav 2 723 452

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• (954): View more from Florida

  pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready

  Fav 1 467 271

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• (856): View more from New Jersey

  Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?

  Fav 2 154 130

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...

  Fav 0 37 47

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• (216): View more from Ohio

  Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out

  Fav 0 56 21

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